In relationships, people tend to feel that they have absolute control over their partner’s time and life. The constant exercise of such control and the desire to have the partner’s complete attention when left unchecked over a long time may give rise to jealousy for other people or things in the boyfriend’s life. This article will provide you ten pointers to help you wade through unwarranted jealousy:
- Take a deep breath and think it through: As jealousy clouds your judgement, close your eyes just take ten long breaths and think about the cause of the feeling. Consider why it is so important for you and the relationship.
- Check the veracity of the jealous thought: Many thoughts that comes to a person’s mind, do not have a factual basis. Search your soul to think whether you are losing your mind worrying about fact or fiction. For e.g. if your boyfriend cancels a date over a meeting, do not think that work is more important to him than you. Consider that he may have his own compulsions to choose the meeting.
- Do not play games: One common mistake jealous partners make is, try to make their lovers also jealous. This is a dangerous game as it seriously undermines your self-worth and makes your boyfriend feel threatened.
- Stop comparing yourselves with the others in his life: Remember that you have a very distinct position in his life than his relatives, friends and acquaintances. Moreover, such comparison hurts you the most.
- Let go the past:Just because you felt abandoned by your parents, siblings or friends in your childhood, this does not mean that your boyfriend will take the same path. Again, don’t compare your past with your present.
- Check for any self-worth issues: Stop thinking that you are not good enough. Consider yourself a beautiful person who deserves to receive love and acceptance from the people you love.
- Improve your own life:By constantly harping on the relationship and your boyfriend alone, you are setting yourself up for jealousy. Spend time with friends, go for shopping, lavish yourself with a session in the beauty parlor or spa and do things you like doing. It’s only when you can truly love & respect yourself can you receive them from others.
- Meditate: If bogged down by constant jealousy, give meditation a shot.Meditation not only calms the mind and drives negative thoughts like jealousy out, it also presents ways by which tackle situations which give rise to jealousy
- Consider the implications of unwarranted jealousy: One of the quick ways to kill love is jealousy. Think about this.
- Think rationally about the impermanence of relationships:In the end, every relationship is bound to end. Even though we grandly promise each other that “we’ll always stay together”, it is possible that if not a break up, then death will eventually end this relationship one day.
However, jealousy sometimes may be valid. Always trust your intuition in those times.